The Love on the Road Series (this one will be long, please don’t get tired)
You left me those vivid memories with blurry images of yours. He did run to you when you asked him to walk slowly in to your space, he crossed the districts to find you, took the risk to meet you, gave his precious times to spend with you, to walk you aimlessly on the street, said those cheesy but addictive cliché good mornings and nights. In other words; you had thought he was over heels for you, till you figured out who owned his heart and who reigned his mind, when he sneaked in to ur tiny room, when he was sitting by your side. When he was all smile and praise for you. And then, all the fact burst your bubble, about how thrilling and easy falling in love could be. Another serial about Love on the road is coming soon on LITTLE ORANGE WORLD, telling about struggle, appreciation, readiness, trying, knocking, and stuffs! . . #loveontheroad #love #life #lovelife #loveandtravel #travel #blog #seoul #southkorea #서울
Started to get entangled.
That one night was not this One Guy and I first encounter at the same weekly meeting. It might be our second or third. However, we had never talked one to another, neither urged to start any conversation. I greeted the other attendees who I already met for at least two times, but him.
Without a proper reason, since I first saw him, I had always felt uncomfortable with his presence around me. I made some distance. My prejudice took the wheel. My fault, but I didn’t feel bad.
Also that one night, each time I took a break from the conversation which was going around on my table, I still remember how I turned my head away from this One Guy, every time our eyes accidentally met, and then I laid my eyes somewhere else to check, whether people who I knew had arrived. In contrary with what my heart desired, among of numerous meeting attendees, why it had to be that One Guy’s eyes that I saw.
Despite that situation, I think it was also that night when our world started to get entangled. Right after I felt really annoyed by the way he looked right into my eyes. 😐
Like many cliches when your story got twisted at the very least expected moment. I had such a cliche at an additional meet up.
Does it sound the same old story? It does to me.
I didn’t expect the presence of this One Guy there, I expected to meet one Another Guy from the same big room instead. Ignoring the fact that I had never met that one Another Guy before, neither seen his picture. However, he sounded so kind and nice and soft when asking about the additional meet up to me, of all people who were being chatty the whole time in the big room. I fell for that.
With all the blissful hope of meeting another interesting personal in the foreign land, I came. And yes, my feeling was just right. That one Another Guy was definitely kind and nice and soft. How he behaved was pleasing. The way he talked was comforting. His eyes were sparkling, showing the lively life, enthusiasm, and respect. He’s all nice and kind. Kind enough to be friend with, to share so many things. Instinct’s talking.
The whole conversation with the Another Guy was enjoyable, until this One Guy arrived. I was down. I got irritated.
Irritated at first minutes, before he came, sat in my vicinity, and then talked to me. Talked to him back was my only choice.
The talking slowly washed away all the bad feelings I had toward him before.
This One Guy showed me his bright personality, his openness, his honesty, his delicate chatty-self. None to hide. The personality that I didn’t dislike, which also led to another leap. That was SO me. I ensured myself to be under control. By following my sad love stories, you might have guessed how this weak heart of mind worked.
I always liked the guy who opened and had insightful kind of talk. This One Guy wasn’t different.
I held it inside. Having such conversation couldn’t go anywhere, but on the meeting; the wall that I tried to build between us. It was actually to keep me safe.
I resisted the feeling.
It bounced back.
Feeling tired, I finally decided to only go for a date or two or several times.
Just in my mind.
I succeed in controlling my kinetic system; for not texting neither calling him first, but mind was going wild.
I endured. It seemed to last forever. I survived and was surprised.
And then it all had gotten entangled more, with only one cheesy simple good morning and later added by good night from him.
He started it first.
It could have been stopped from the very first, but it was kind of addictive. It continued. I asked him out. I thought it could be one pleasing dating game. I set the final date. I had to be in control. He agreed. He played it right.
I invited him closer to my space. We played it more intense than what I planned. I got completely entangled because one more thing was coming stronger; feeling, but I enjoyed it.
He was completely in to the game. He seemed to enjoy the game, the way I did. That what was I thought. The next thing, I found out that he had different way of enjoying it. This One Guy invited more people into the game. If only he invited Someone that I completely didn’t know, I would have been a very understanding person considering it was all time set. Though. However he played it hard. He invited Someone from my limited group. My pride hurt. I couldn’t bear that. I wish this One Guy completely had no idea about how close that Someone and I was.
For a (made up) relationship, it got twisted, in which more than two people involved, more over four; This One Guy, Me, My Friend, and My Feelings.
The relationship got twisted more and more (it might be from my point of view only). I hated the fact. I hated that I played the game at the first place.
I might be the one who broke the rules first. First, I simply broke it by later taking it a bit further than our deal. Second, for expecting him filling in the space, which was left empty by my previous Seoul’s sad dating stories. I shouldn’t have done that.
Feeling was not a game anyway.
For all the nice and sweet things he had done to me, I still needed to cut either him or the twisted threads.
I cut both!
And I keep My Friend, that Someone.
The funny thing was, my Someone completely had no idea about what did happen. Only three of us, one of which was another outsider, and now you.
Shall I tell her this funny yet slightly strange story?